1) writing on bathroom stalls (ie. “tom + sara = love foreva” or “i <3 peter!”). why?? do you run back out the bathroom, go to your boyfriend and say “baby, baby, i love you SO much that i couldn’t stop thinking about you, even while i’m (via alex: “dropping the kids off at the pool). so i had to make sure that countless other strangers who enter that stall to similarly “drop their kids off at the pool” witness our beautiful love… written on a McDonald’s plastic bathroom stall… using a BIC pen.

2) girls who wear “i love my boyfriend” t-shirts. maybe this is some cool new alt thing that has to do with some vintage british band and i’m just not in the know. but otherwise… wtf?! if i were a dude i’d be like “WOMAN. can you chill the eff out with that?” maybe i’ll manufacture a line of shirts for all the ups and downs of a relationship:

“i love my boyfriend”

“i hate my boyfriend”

“i love my boyfriend but sometimes i’m struck with this overwhelming sadness because i feel like he loves me for what i represent to him rather than the singular qualities i possess which i believe to comprise the make-up of who i am as a human”